Broken Moon: Part 5
BROKEN MOON, PART 5
Claudia King
Published by Claudia King at Smashwords
Copyright © 2014 Claudia King
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* * * * *
Broken Moon, Part 5
* * * * *
"What now?" Cyan said softly into her ear.
"I thought we were going further down the mountain."
He touched her shoulder. "You know what I mean."
April closed her eyes. She would have been happy to let the previous night last forever, trapped in a magical bubble sealed off from the rest of the world, where nobody would ever intrude and morning would never come.
But morning had come, and the world was waiting. The time for mindless, selfish bliss was over. Her pack needed her, and for their sake she had to stand by her convictions, no matter how hard she found it. Would she have traded away last night to be free from the pain she faced now of putting it behind her?
"Nothing's changed," she said. She sealed her emotions away in her heart, burying them somewhere deep where they would not reach her. She knew it was only a matter of time before they returned, more raw than ever, but for a short while at least she could keep them quiet. One of the many things she had learned over the past few days was that she was capable of enduring far more than she gave herself credit for. She prayed it wasn't a misplaced hope.
"I can wait for you to change your mind," Cyan said, kissing her shoulder.
"If you really care, you won't try to make me change it."
"I never said I would."
April sat up, freeing herself from the half-open sleeping bag. Cyan remained lying down beside her, watching patiently. He had been short with her the day before, but now he seemed calmer than she'd ever seen him.
"You don't have to stay," April said. "You know what Hazel will do to you."
"Yesterday you said you needed my help."
"I do." She paused. "But if the only reason you're staying is... if it's just because of us, I don't know if I can give you what you want."
"The only reason I ever stayed was because of you."
"And Lisa?"
"And her, " he admitted.
"I don't want to be your damsel in distress. I know that's what your wolf thinks of me now that she's gone."
Cyan laced his fingers together behind his head, gazing up at the roof of the tent. "Maybe he does, but that's not what I think. I've tried being a leader, and every time it's ended badly. You're the one in charge now. You be the queen, I'll be your knight. That's all I want."
She was about to argue, but when she looked at him she saw a look of calm acceptance on his face. She had asked for his help, and he had resolved to give it. Because he cared that much for her? Or because it was the only thing he had left?
Once she had gotten up April washed in the shallow pool near the fire. The heat had kept the water from freezing, but it was still bitingly cold, and by the time she had cleaned away the last traces of her and Cyan's lovemaking she was shivering.
It was only once she had dressed that she realised they were no longer alone in the cave.
Where the morning light streamed in around the corner, a long shadow lay silently against the far wall. It barely moved, but after a moment of staring April was sure it belonged to a person. Someone was sitting near the cave's entrance.
She held her breath and crept forward, afraid to call to Cyan in case she alerted the stranger. If it was Hazel, there would be others with him. There was no way to escape this time.
As she edged around the corner the figure slid into view. He sat on a rock with his long coat wrapped around him, staring down the empty mountain slope with his back to her. His hair was dishevelled, and he looked to be alone.
April let out the breath she had been holding and took a step forward. "Blackthorn?"
He tilted his head slightly, unsurprised by her appearance. "Warm and cosy in there?" he said, the bitterness in his voice plain to hear.
April glanced back, gesturing at Cyan to wait as he rose from the tent. Her first instinct was to give in to the shame she felt welling up insider her, to explain to Blackthorn how it wasn't what he thought, to beg him not to judge her. Instead she tucked her hands into her pockets and waited.
"How could you, April?" Blackthorn said, and he finally turned to look at her with red-rimmed eyes. "You three, you and Ingrid and Harper, I always knew I could rely on you. You and him were so perfect together."
"Perfect for the rest of the pack," April said. "Not perfect for me." She tried to sound stern without being cold. They were past the tipping point now, all of them. If she wanted to make things right, she couldn't carry on pretending to be the person her pack wanted her to be.
"Then why didn't you say anything? You just— you just lie, let us think everything's right when it's not, and then this happens!" He snorted. "You're just like Harriet."
April put a hand on his shoulder and sat down beside him. She was glad he hadn't said, you're just like Ingrid.
"I was scared," she said. "My grandmother spent half her life mated to someone she didn't want to be with, and when she finally spoke up they punished her for it. Do you really wish I'd had a life like that too?"
Blackthorn's brow creased, his eyes darting to her back. "I used to think she got what she deserved," he said softly. "I didn't think I'd have a problem using that whip on someone if they broke our rules. But I never thought it would be you." He looked at her with glistening eyes. "I couldn't. Not to you."
April reached for his hand, and he didn't pull away when she squeezed it.
"None of our rules are perfect, are they?" she said.
Blackthorn set his jaw stubbornly and looked away. He had never been as blinkered by their pack's traditions as the others, but he'd still spent all of his adult life upholding them. April suspected the last few days had been just as hard on him as they had on her.
"Did Hazel send you to look for me?" she said tentatively.
"He's no leader of mine. I haven't been back to camp since he whipped you." Blackthorn's tone was still prickly, but the bitter edge to his voice had softened. He could never truly hate her, just as she could never hate him. They'd been friends for too many years for her relationship with Cyan to drive a wedge between them permanently.
She continued to hold his hand as she repeated what she'd told Cyan the day before, telling Blackthorn everything she knew about the current state of the Highland Pack, along with how she'd escaped through the caves and struggled on the brink of life and death for hours afterwards.
"He saved you again," Blackthorn murmured, looking back into the cave behind them. April could hear the sounds of Cyan washing in the pool.
"He's a good person, even if he's not one of us," April said. She laid her free hand on Blackthorn's arm. "You agreed with him about the human girl, didn't you? And whatever you might think, he never tried to... take advantage. I trust him, and you should too."
Blackthorn glowered. "I was starting to, before all this came out."
"We need his help if we're ever going to put things right."
"He knew about what Ingrid did, and he never told us."
"Can you blame him? Things are worse than ever now that she's gone. He said—"
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"I wouldn't have told you at all if I'd been thinking straight," Cyan cut in as he appeared behind them, buttoning up his jacket. He sat down a respectable distance away from Blackthorn, the tension between them bringing an uncomfortable silence to the conversation until April spoke again.
"We need to make Hazel step down as elder and put Harriet back in charge. I don't care if you two want to argue when it's over, but can't you put it behind you for now? We've got more important things to focus on."
"I'm not the one with the problem," Cyan said.
"No, you're just the one who makes the problems," Blackthorn retorted, then looked back to April. "I can't help but feel like none of this would have happened if it weren't for him showing up."
"You know none of it was his fault," she said, her voice hardening. Blackthorn might be upset, but he needed to put his feelings aside for the time being. She'd had to do the same, and as difficult as it was to be around Cyan without letting her emotions spill out, she had no other choice if she wanted to carry on doing what needed to be done.
Her heart and her mind were at war over what she wanted, and it was too hard to focus on one of them without ignoring the other. When she'd woken up that morning the desire to take Cyan up on his offer of running away together had been so tempting she'd almost given in to it. Then, moments later, the terrible fear of what might happen to her pack without her had set in. If she wanted to be with Cyan she knew she wouldn't be able to focus on being the leader her people needed, and in being that leader to the fullest of her ability she would have no time to puzzle out and embrace the desires of her heart. One was a crippling distraction from the other, and she had chosen the needs of her pack over her own selfish feelings. If she could do it, then Blackthorn would need to do the same.
The two males glowered at one another, one with suspicion, the other with indignation.
Blackthorn spoke first.
"If it comes to a fight, none of the others will be a match for the two of us."
"I'll watch your back if you watch mine," Cyan said.
Blackthorn gave him a small nod, and April relaxed slightly.
"It mustn't come to that," she said. "Whatever happens, I don't want us starting a war with our pack."
"A lot of them would back you, you know," Blackthorn said. "You've got a lot of friends, more than Hazel at any rate. If you challenged him, they'd take your side."
"Like Harriet and Elthy? Garland? Gene? You'd want to throw them into a fight?"
"That Garland seemed tough enough to me," Cyan said.
"They're old," April retorted. "And what about the children? What happens to them when people start getting hurt?" She shook her head. "You two need to promise me you won't turn this into a fight."
Blackthorn grimaced. "I won't, but there's a thing or two I'd like to do to Hazel if I had the chance."
"You and me both," Cyan said. "And if he makes the first move you'll need our protection, April."
"Alright," she conceded. "Protection, but that's all. And we avoid confrontation whenever we can, okay?"
The two males nodded their assent.
"How do you plan on making Hazel step down without it getting violent?" Blackthorn asked.
"I don't know, but I think we should talk to Harriet. If anyone can fix this, it'll be her," April said with a sigh.
"We shouldn't go back to the camp without a proper plan, it's too dangerous."
"He's right, if it turns out Harriet can't help us we need to know what we're doing without her," Cyan said.
April shrugged, her frustration growing. She was fumbling her way forward in a role she still understood so little. Determination was one thing, but she'd never had to come up with plans and strategies before.
"There is one way you might make the others listen," Blackthorn said at length. He looked out over the mountain slope, his expression darkening. "Hazel only has power because our pack needs an elder, and he's all they have right now. So find Ingrid. Make her name you her successor."
"Why not just have Harriet do it?" Cyan said.
April nodded slowly, the pieces starting to come together in her mind. "Each elder can only ever name one successor. Ingrid was Harriet's, and Hazel made Gene name him. Ingrid's the only one left who hasn't picked an heir."
"She was waiting for you to be old enough," Blackthorn said.
Cyan rubbed his chin, glancing from one of them to the other. "Wouldn't we stand a better chance of having the others listen if we got her to pick Blackthorn? Everyone seemed more than ready to let him take charge after Ingrid ran off."
"Plus half of them probably think I'm a traitor," April said quietly.
Blackthorn shook his head, still gazing into the distance. "I doubt that's going to happen. Where do you think I've been these last two days?"
A hint of unease prickled the back of April's neck, and she fell silent. Blackthorn didn't look like he'd slept, and fresh threads had been torn loose from his coat. Where had he been?
"I went looking for Ingrid after she left," he said, his voice hoarse. "I couldn't think of what else to do. I needed to know... it was the lies, I just needed to know why."
April saw a flash of anger in his expression, and for a moment his judgemental look returned as he glanced at her.
"It was hard tracking her. I didn't stop all night till I caught up with her on the other side of the mountain. She was well out of our territory by then."
"What happened?" April said. She was curious and fearful at the same time.
"The ferals were with her. They attacked me, until she stopped them. After that..." He took a deep breath. "I was too angry at her to talk properly. I said I wished her ferals were all dead, that I'd kill them myself if I ever saw them again. Then I told her she should have been the one who died instead of Harper."
He was trembling. April tried to take his hand again, but this time he pulled away.
"You didn't mean it," she said.
Blackthorn sniffed and shook his head abruptly. "It doesn't matter anyway. You were always the one she wanted to take her place."
"So there's no chance she'll name you?" Cyan said.
"We'll have to find out," April replied, rising to her feet. "You know where to find her, Blackthorn?"
He hung his head, rubbing his eyes with a thumb and forefinger, then nodded. "It'll take us a day to get there, and it's straight into feral territory."
"Let's hope we won't have to worry about them if Ingrid's around," Cyan said.
"If she's around," Blackthorn murmured. "And there's one other thing, too. Before I followed your scents back here I ran across a few others further up the mountain. Fresh ones."
April and Cyan exchanged anxious glances.
"Hazel's out there with at least two patrols, maybe more. They got started a day late, but if they keep searching they'll find Ingrid eventually."
April breathed in sharply. "Before I left he said he was going to get rid of the ferals once and for all."
"Or maybe he came to the same conclusion Blackthorn did," Cyan said darkly. "Hazel's smart. He must have realised Ingrid's the only one who can name a successor to oppose him. His biggest weakness now is if someone tries to use his precious rules against him."
"He wouldn't kill Ingrid!" April protested. "The others wouldn't let him."
"The others weren't around when he killed Lisa." Cyan's eyes burned with anger. "And I thought hurting one of your own was the worst thing a wolf from the Highland Pack could do? What's Ingrid's punishment for Harper supposed to be?"
"Exile," Blackthorn said, "or death."
April bit her lip hard. No matter how strongly she felt about what her mother had done, the thought of losing her still hurt terribly. She couldn't bear the thought of seeing anyone else die if she had the power to stop it.
* * * * *
April was anxious to leave, but Cyan insisted they took the time to prepare properly for their journey up the mountain. Blackthorn was clearly exhausted and hungry. T
hey cooked the bird they had caught the day before for him to eat, sharing a few leftover scraps between themselves before packing up the rest of their supplies while he napped. They were done bundling up the tent and stowing it in Lisa's pack within a few minutes, but Cyan let Blackthorn sleep for a good hour before waking him. He had been confident the pair of them could defend April from the ferals and Hazel's patrols together, but with Blackthorn on the verge of exhaustion that confidence was diminished. Hopefully they'd get lucky and avoid running into anyone on their way to find Ingrid.
All of the despair and isolation Cyan had experienced since Lisa's death had eased after his night with April. Even his anger, though it still flared up again when he thought of Hazel, had dimmed to a manageable burn at the centre of his chest. April was all that mattered to him now. Her goals and desires were his, and his purpose was to stay by her side until she was safe again.
He had always protected others, he mused as the three of them set out together up the rocky mountain slope. Since his first day as a werewolf he had taken it upon himself to make sure he looked out for those in need, shouldering their burdens so that they wouldn't have to carry them alone. He'd thought becoming an alpha was the best way to continue doing that, but now he wasn't so sure. His instinct was too volatile to handle that kind of power by himself. He knew full well what he was capable of when his wolf took control. He would have killed Hazel that night on the mountain slopes if Blackthorn hadn't stopped him, just as he would have killed the others who had wronged him in the past. But a true protector didn't kill.
April was there to temper his fiery instinct. Even Blackthorn's presence, he begrudgingly admitted, helped him to look at things in a different light. Perhaps losing all of his power had been exactly what he needed to realise that he was better off without it.